Sunday, February 28, 2010

Order Superimposed Upon Still Chaos

For the ego....chaos is the norm. However, the ego makes compromises with chaos, thereby, constructing  an illusion of 'order.'

Yet, because this 'order' is nothing more than abstract chaos, compromises break down and eventually lead to utter disillusionment with delusional order. We see this happening in the world today. Structures from which the ego define itself are crumbling as egos defiantly struggle to maintain these imaginary structures from which self-actualization is achieved.

But if the structures are delusional, so is your actualization. It never was and never will be...'actual.'

The world is experiencing what seems a break down of the actual 'order,' but only because order was never there in the first place, only a belief in order superimposed upon chaos.

The ego-self can never have anything but disorder and chaos, simply because it does NOT know what its 'purpose' IS and therefore, knows NOT what it IS.

A mind without purpose, can only experience chaos and be forced to make it work. Thus, you have installed all manner of purposes upon your experience of self and world.

Are you fulfilled by your career? Your family, your finances, your possessions? Do you demand your "life" be meaningful? Do you lead a "purposeful" existence?

How will you cope when all is finally exposed as delusional nothingness? When all your significant purposes and functions become nothing more than phantasmagorical delusion. What will "you" be? How will you define your 'self'? Will you seek to anchor your 'self ' to new beliefs? Will you become immersed in your "spirituality" and religion? Will you adopt a belief in "non-duality"?

Will you become angry? Will you fall into despair? Will you struggle to make it all REAL again?

Maybe it's time to start dissembling the ego. Maybe it's time to start dissecting the self. Maybe it's time to start accepting chaos and become an infinite player. Such a game has no outcome and no purpose....

...and in your only freedom.

But can you stand it?

Artwork by Luis Lorenzana - "The World is Full of Lonely People"

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

"Free-Will" is on the Menu (but we all chose the menu)

Are you an individual? An individual actor pressing against the world in order to self-actualize as an individual with goals and dreams, lodged solely in your mind, dissociated from a world of other minds?

People make choices everyday that demand you makes choices in response, demanding choices from them that again, demand you make choices causing choices again from them, etc, etc, etc, on and on and on, ad infinitum.

This is the infinite game that we all play. Although many deny this contingency and become finite players, actually believing they have individual "free-will."

You have no authority over your 'self.' But then neither do 'they.' We are so deeply connected and intricately intertwined as to negate and nullify the 'self' almost entirely. But still... the thought of being a separate individual 'self' persists even though our whole life as been directed by a world of others that direct us as we direct them.

However, it does feel good to think that you have separate authority over your self and make choices that are not contingent upon anything but "you." Ha!

Such is the myth of individuality….

The physical body has nothing to do with it. Animals have a physical body, but they lack a 'self.' Possibly, nature fully realizes its contingent interdependence and therefore, it has no need for individual 'selves.'
We are absolutely contingent on one another. You may choose not to share or cooperate on the surface, but below the surface, your existence is absolutely contingent on an interdependence with others, whether you like it or not or wish to be aware of it or not. It can be a frightening thought for an ego to consider.

Let's cut to the chase shall we... Do you use the word “I” in reference to your 'self.' So where did you come upon this identification? Did you simply conjure up this 'self; out of thin air? Most likely your learned to be a 'self,' so in essence, “you” would NOT exist if not for others. It's too late to consider returning to the forest to live out some primordial feral state of "non-self," because the self you learned to be, will only keep getting in the way. Your individual authority is absolutely contingent on there being 'others' for which to contrast a 'self' as opposed to, or in harmony with, others.

No others = no self.

You might as well engage in the interdependent flow, since disengaging is delusional.

Every choice is contingent on others being 'there.' Even the choice to completely disengage and live as a hermit in the forest, presupposes others for which to disengage from. Your Being is contingent on their Being as their Being is contingent on yours.

But wait, it gets better!

Because “you” were not constructed in isolation from a world of others, not one thought in your head belongs exclusively to “you.” (this includes everything I write in this blog and anything you read in every other blog....all absolutely contingent).
I'm not saying there is NO free-will, just that there is NO free-will exclusive to an individual “you.”

This interdependent contingency is absolute, even to make that statement “I am not absolute anything” demands others for which to contrast an “I” as not absolute. We are interdependent on one another and all choices are contingent on choices made by others, which are contingent on choices you have made.

We exist together interdependently, deluded into a belief of independent individuality. Watch how your ego squirms at the idea that individual "awakening" is a delusion and "you" can never have it independent of others. You will have something, but this is no more than individual delusion and any experience you interpret comes from a menu of experiences that we have all constructed together.

You can continue to exercise authority over yourself until the cows come home, but essentially, it makes little difference. You may choose to do anything you like, but your individual authority will always be contingent on the authority imposed by others who share an experience of a world and that world experience comes to you through a mutual exchange. “Free-will” is contingent on the free-will of others, which cancels out all individual free-will. All your choices are made in relation to a world of others and therefore, are never entirely free of that contingency (although this is often unconscious, maintaining the delusion of free-will and choices made separate from a world of others).

Certainly you may feel free to exercise independent choices, but you may wish to surrender the delusion of your choices being freely made. We live in a world of contingency, where the existence of "you" as a concept is contingent on the concept of 'them.' Your individual free-will is contingent on "free-will" being a menu choice. But only because we agree as to what is ON the menu. This makes your free-will choices entirely contingent on choosing from the menu, which means it is NOT free at all.

Free-will is real, but individual free-will is delusional. This is why individuals cannot "awaken" to anything more than what is on the menu.

It's all a 'given,' since you have no choice but to CHOOSE from the menu that the world offers and that menu is a mutual construct we have ALL manufactured collectively. You and I and every mind that thinks as a 'self,' has constructed the menu from which we all choose. If there is only one menu (world of others) to choose from, how are you then implementing free-will? 
We can create a different menu, but only together, because the menu we created is contingent on all of us choosing from that menu for it to exist at all….and we always do.

You and I and everyone are contingent beings, entirely contingent on others defining us from moment to moment as we define them. There is no escape from contingency, best to engage it.

You are NOT free to claim "enlightenment" or "awakening," because if it weren't on the menu, you could NOT claim it at all.

You don't just live WITH others, you are contingent ON others as they are contingent ON you. We are all interdependently contingent on one another, but in our demand for individuality we are intoxicated with the self and so fail to see that, without others, a 'self' could NOT exist.

We may finally awaken, but never individually, simply because we are absolutely contingent on one another. We do not create ourselves in isolation from other selves. We construct the self contingent on other selves being 'there.' No one has any idea what a self-construct manufactured without others would be like and this is why contingency is absolute.

You and I are unique, but only in relation to the menu from which we have chosen our values in order to construct the self. The menu is, and always will be, an interdependent construct that we all created. No one chooses free of the menu, until ALL choose to discard the menu. Until then, individual free-will is a delusion, that we have yet to weary of.

Are you seeking to "awaken" to truth?

Luckily... that's on the menu too.

Bon Apetit!

Artwork by Karl Persson - "Lunch Monkey"

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Finite Players Sacrifice and Suffer (and so, cannot envision horizons)

Egos don’t like to look at the big picture. This is because the big picture tends to emphasize that the ego doesn’t exist and, therefore, everything it stands for is absurd.

How can what doesn’t exist stand for anything of value?   
From this incapacity to see broadly comes a failure to conceptualize anything long-term. Even though egos don’t really exist, they do believe they will ‘die’ and this makes the belief in 'existence' a very desperate affair, demanding much-term short suffering and sacrifice.

Because all egos believe they will eventually cease to exist (which is how an ego actually identifies itself) they are very adept at pursuing short-term results. This is because the long-term (big-picture) doesn’t really consist of results or solutions, but processes and horizons.
Egos need results that demand sacrifice and sacrifice is always associated with suffering. An ego that does NOT suffer through sacrifice would have NO reason to believe it exists, since how else does a self actualize, if not through sacrifice? Sacrifice and suffering is endemic to the egocentric belief system (“you”).
Therefore, we can easily understand how not being able to envision a broad perspective has resulted in the current deteriorating world crisis. Suffering is “arising’ at an accelerated rate as more egos experience greater sacrifice in playing finite games. In the coming years (and even months), all ego-centered collective enclaves (nation, states, regions, communities, families, individuals) will experience significant suffering through the slow dissolution of the monetary value-systems that have been devised to avoid the big picture by demanding self-actualization through short-term egocentric results.
In the past century, many egos have become so deeply accustomed to the monetary-value system of egocentric self-actualizing, that engagement with others outside of this system has become practically non-existent. We even teach our children how best to succeed in these games and such teachings we believe are a product of "love" and necessary to existence.
This is also apparent in spiritual circles in which spiritual “masters” compete for short-term titles and prizes by teaching short-term, spiritualized, techno-skills promising rapid self-actualizing results that have little or no focus on long-term, big-picture processes or horizons. This spirituality-in-a-box, or just-add-water-salvation, provides short-term egocentric value, but reinforces the current disengaged separatism that has allowed ‘individuals’ to abstract themselves from any process that envisions horizons. This is because a ‘horizon’ is infinite and to envision horizons requires infinite play.

Finite players cannot envision horizons because a horizon has no outcome or reward that can be prepared for and thus, expected. 
Horizons can be imagined but not seen. Any attempt to ‘perceive’ a horizon locks it into place, thereby, causing its disappearance. The closer you get to a horizon, the farther away it becomes. Horizons emphasize process, but naturally negate outcomes. Egos demand outcomes for which to measure actual ‘existence,’ which relates to the games of “self-actualizing.” All self-actualizing games demand sacrifice through which an ego can realize ‘actual’ results and, although self-actualizing is seen by many egos as involving a process, it is a finite process in which rewards are expected and prepared for through much suffering and sacrifice.
Egos rarely engage in games that do not demand sacrifice, since all results must be associated with sacrifice in order to be considered in anyway rewarding (“no pain, no gain”). This reinforces short-term processes that fail to envision the big-picture and, therefore, fail to envision horizons. A world experiencing increasing degrees of suffering and sacrifice is a world no longer capable of envisioning horizons.      

The absence of a horizon allows death to end the game, when actually the game never ends.  
Horizons emphasize process with no end, since a horizon never ends. You can never reach a horizon, but a horizon can be envisioned. Infinite players envision horizons because they thrive in process and measure self-actualizing by the ability to envision horizons through activating imagination.

Infinite players play with horizons by recognizing that such envisioning has no outcome, but goes on indefinitely. Infinite players realize that when the game never ends, no control need be applied to win the game and when control is no longer necessary, horizons miraculously appear as ‘surprising’ (but never expected).  
Obviously, such envisioning is difficult for an ego solely accustomed to sacrificing for short-term results (rewards). However, in denying a need for results, engagement with horizons becomes quite surprising and such surprise is always unprepared for and unexpected.  To engage with horizons the ego must let go of what it expects, thereby, expecting what it could never prepare for or predict. This allows the freedom to envision horizons and play infinitely, which has very surprising consequences for an infinite player, in the realization that sacrifice is unnecessary.

When sacrifice is no longer necessary, no control need be applied and freedom is experienced as an infinite horizon which, of course, is what freedom is.  
As more egos become disillusioned with the monetary-value system of self-actualization, they may become more willing to envision horizons and play games infinitely, thereby, no longer experiencing the suffering and sacrifice necessary to finite games.
This might result in some unexpected and surprising changes on the horizon.

But only for those who can envision horizons....
Artwork by Nerrida Parfitt - "Quiet Retreat

Thursday, February 11, 2010

'God' is a Warm, Cuddly Platitude

Finite players seek outcomes in spiritual games. Finite players make spirituality finite, simply because a finite player plays for effect.

The greater the effect the greater the reward. Finite players do not care for uncertainty. Therefore, in order to attain an effect, they employ concepts that have become known to evoke an effect from listeners. Listeners experience an effect simply because they have learned that this is expected.

If one employs the concept of “beingness” then an effective response should be exhibited by the audience. If one employs the concept of “God” this too, is managed for a desired effect from the listener which, in turn, results in a reward to the speaker.

Thus, we have the platitudes of “divine,” “universal,” “energy,” “being,” “healing,” “journey,” "oneness," etc, etc, etc,  pronounced with profound repetition in spiritual circles in order to evoke emotional responses from the listeners (audience). These concepts are steeped in antiquity and thus, have historical precedence as a foundation and are entirely based on the past. Unfortunately, over time they have been stripped of any genuine meaning, becoming nothing more than platitudes. Listeners may feel incumbent to respond accordingly, but this is usually scripted and easily predicted as the expected response when such platitudes are spoken.

Platitudes are surface concepts. They have little substantive depth and have proven to be entirely inconsequential to evolving consciousness, simply because they engage only the surface mind. Nevertheless, those devoted to platitudes are resistant to give them up, since they still bring the speaker a reward for the speaking and the ego is very reward driven.

Post-Modern spirituality requires a new lexicon of evocative dialogue. A dialogue that does not rigidly conform to the antiquity of axial age proclamations and that leads both listener and speaker to infinitely play the game of spirituality.

Spirituality is IN relationship and is not a solitary egocentric engagement. We “journey” together and not alone (as much as we may like to think that we "journey" alone).

The dialogue of relationship speaks to depth in allowing depth to be discovered between minds. It breaks from surface platitudes and engages in an existential “lived-experience” that is full of Deep Spirit substance. It is dramatic, spontaneous, unscripted and real. It often surrenders masks and roles to become something quite surprising and unprepared for, but it can be a frightening experience for an ego-self, secluded and confined in its 'selfhood.'

We can easily identify the surface shadows that impede growth. But the shadows that lie in the depths of consciousness are not plumbed through the repetitive mouthing of spiritual platitudes. The shadows that roam your depths are only realized in the depth of fully engaged relationship. This dialogue is not a dialogue of Gaia, since to engage in a relationship with nature we must first learn to relate to one another. Nature is counting on this saving grace, because it is only when we can learn to fully engage with each other that we can learn to fully engage with nature. Until then nature (earth) is as doomed as we are, since we will most likely take it with us in our surface, self-destruction.

The post-modern spirituality is a spirituality of relationship, endorsing a full engagement with others and the world. It is often NOT warm and cuddly, because in the depths the shadows are much more rigid and reified and have yet to be realized. However, when we engage fully, the unknown rises up for full inspection.
To fear those depths is to control relationships in avoidance of a deeper truth. It is a fear of intimacy and a fear of exposure. Because of this fear the dialogue is often enmeshed in warm and cuddly platitudes. Yet, this is often the fate of most intimate relationships, in which a fear of exposure impedes going deeper and ultimately leads to perpetual alienation and estrangement.

Look beyond the spiritual platitudes and you will often find a frightened ego running from a history of failed relationships and fearing for its 'life.' It's not others that you fear, but what they can show you about your 'self.'

The appearance of depth through scripted dialogue is very deceiving. But scripted roles attest to the need for specific outcomes. The actors following a script are fully prepared for the anticipated outcome and thus, are rarely surprised. The ego easily adapts to expectations that help it remain on the surface, forever avoiding what could be discovered in the depth.

If you wish to plumb the depths of yourself, then let go of your need to control direction. The need to control is nothing more than an egocentric fear of what can be learned about the self by fully engaging with others. We may not like what we find, but it's there' to be found....

like it or not....

Artwork by David Stoupakis - "untitled"

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Circuitry of Consciousness: Alternating vs Direct Current (metaphor)

The self-construct (“you”) was NOT conceived apart from a world of other egos. Such a reciprocal exchange makes us exclusively “other-referencing” and even in our most isolated egocentric moments we are drawn to one another through the circuit that connects us.

The content of every individual mind is a story of birth and death and this is available to all minds. Everything in between is only meaningless filler, simply because it makes no difference to the story of birth and death.

However, it may be very meaningful to “you.”

Nevertheless, others define you as you define them and this is occurring moment to moment since you became aware of an individual ego-self ‘existence” (an existence in which other egos were necessary to your awareness of a ‘self’). This circuit of consciousness has no direct source, but is an “alternating current” infinitely connecting all minds.

However, the ego can misinterpret the circuit as “direct current.” The ego demands division from the circuit through which it constructed itself in order to experience itself as exclusive-to-itself. It misinterprets alternating current by asserting a direct line from itself to itself, assuming total authority of itself, by itself. This negates all but the most minimal of influence from, (or to) others, making it easy for the ego to maintain its narcissistic “existence” in contrast to other egos and this is why there is a tendency to keep our thoughts undisclosed and private.

Of course, this is delusional, since all current alternates between minds and experience is constructed based on that exchange. This is why all experiences must agree or else we could not communicate.

The egocentric self-construct must always interpret alternating current as direct, otherwise its belief in a localized self-consciousness would be dissolved and it would be privy to the content of other localized minds as they would be aware of the content of its consciousness. To believe that localized content is available to other localized minds, would be to end egocentric existence entirely and this is a very fearful idea to an ego glorified in its individual exclusivity.

But is there really exclusivity to your experiences? Although you certainly interpret your experiences as exclusive to “you,” is this actually the case or is it merely a grandiose egocentric delusion? Your thoughts are different from mine in relation to time, but are they different in relation to content?

Although the circuit of consciousness is infinite, we limit what can be experienced thereby setting limits to consciousness. We agree that we cannot “move mountains” and no individual has ever done so (except maybe through dynamite).

This explains the brief psychologically paranormal experiences often reported by individuals, such as precognition or past lives. What occurs in these atypical instances is that individuals attain brief contact with the circuit’s alternating current. Such experiences are beyond the usual realm of direct current and can be disorienting and sometimes shocking to the normalized and conventionally conditioned ego-self.

Hence, experiences of awakening are nothing more than brief disorienting experiences of alternating current, as opposed to direct current, resulting in all manner of abnormal, atypical, and seemingly miraculous, encounters. Nevertheless, this can only shock the normalized ego back into directly continuing to assert itself as direct source of itself. This is why experiences of “awakening” or “enlightenment” never last. An Individual will revert all experiences into direct current, thereby, interrupting the charge.

Direct current automatically imposes time constrictions making experiences finite, temporal and conventionally expected. However, alternating current, running between minds, has no restrictions, limits or conditions and so it is very unexpected. When individuals serendipitously and spontaneously find themselves briefly experiencing this alternating current, they are afforded momentary glimpses of other minds and really nothing more than this, since there is really only One Mind. This experience is not thought based, since our thoughts are oriented entirely on direct current. However, it is an experience of the circuit of which we are all connected. Therefore, contrary to egocentric individualism, we are entirely the same (metaphysically speaking, of course)

Welcome to the Grand illusion
Come on in and see what's happening
Pay the price, get your tickets for the show
The stage is set, the band starts playing
Suddenly your heart is pounding
Wishing secretly you were a star.

But don't be fooled by the radio
The TV or the magazines
They show you photographs of how your life should be
But they're just someone else's fantasy
So if you think your life is complete confusion

Because you never win the game
Just remember that it's a Grand illusion
And deep inside we're all the same.
We're all the same...

So if you think your life is complete confusion
Because your neighbors got it made
Just remember that it's a Grand illusion
And deep inside we're all the same.
We're all the same...

America spells competition, join us in our blind ambition
Get yourself a brand new motor car
Someday soon we'll stop to ponder what on Earth's this spell we're under
We made the grade and still we wonder who the hell we are