The 'Sheit Happens' Prayer

I just completed another day that I had nothing to do with and sheit happened as it always does.

Funny how this seems to be the pattern of each and every day, although, deeply enmeshed within that pattern is the socially conditioned idea that "I-me" is in charge of the sheit that happened within that 24 hr period and that it's completely up to "I-me" how I deal with the sheit that happened.

Looking back on the thoughts, feelings and behaviors of the day it becomes crystal clear...

...my responses to the sheit that happened was, like the sheit that happened, completely outside "my" control and simply more sheit happening.

The responses to the sheit happening was just more sheit happening and was directed by neuro-circuited habituated impulses wired up in cranially based fatty tissue, all firing off under the direction of countless neuro-chemical interactions, i.e. dopamine, serotonin, enkephalins, endorphins, epinephrine, norepinephrine, glutamate, acetylcholine, etc,and numerous hormonal interactions (do you really think you have control over this sheit?), as well as sundry other psycho-emotive medicinals such as oxyticin, progestin, cortisol, etc, etc, etc.

Of all the ways I could have responded to the sheit that happened, my brain chose that particular way, because it had no choice based on trillions of miles of enmeshed dendrite circuits. 

How can "I-me' be responsible for the actions based on the impulses of a genetically/culturally programmed bodily organ (brain) when, in fact, that organ was primarily constructed in my formative years without any active participation on my part. Is "I-me" responsible for keeping the heart beating? Is "I-me" responsible for the lungs filling with air? Of course, most organs do what they are genetically programmed to do and this is no different for the brain that must respond to external influences from survival circuits deep within its core.

Your brain is a part of the grand universal expanse that is the causally predetermined natural order and...

...not a part of "you." 

For those who fully "grok" this understanding, living within the parameters of such an absence of control can be exhilarating. But it is a hard pill to swallow and can take years, even decades to neuro-plastically prune back useless "I-me" responsibility circuits. Although this may seem like an assertion of control, it is actually the brain rerouting unused circuits attributed to free-will and control and it will be the brain and not "you" that engages that process. In fact, that process may eventually deconstruct "you" entirely.

Yet, I cannot deny the reflexive response engaging my "self" to experience guilt when sheit was bad and pride when sheit was good, such is the powerful nature of habituated impulses hard-wired in head fat. Yet, currently, this engagement is consistently brief and I quickly return to my original absence of free-will and, in realizing I have nothing to do with any of this...

...sheit that just happens.

For human egocentrica mammalians the idea of controlling nature, the nature that is simply a part of a predetermined causal order that directs all sentient and non-sentient existence, is paramount and, in a world overly populated by human egocentrics, all the sheit they do to assert control over their unique personal world, which is inextricably enmeshed in other personal worlds, results in an insane cacophony, growing exponentially in magnitude and intensity to a point where most egocentrics are actually beginning to realize that they are in control of nothing and everything is gradually becoming completely uncontrollable

No matter what precautions you undertake. No matter how much education and learning you employ to insure your protected from certain sheit happening. No matter how much planning you meticulously engineer to avoid sheit from happening in ways you desire NOT...

...sheit just happens.

Even when good sheit happens, I no longer seem to care. For a brief moment I'm all jiggy with it, but that fades fast, causing me to fall back into my "sheit happens" baseline mental state, understanding that in a dualistic world, sheit happens dualistically. That's the state I'm in 99% of the time. I move from moment to moment waiting to see what sheit happens, because some kinda sheit always happens.

It's kinda like living in a state of perpetual surprise, I'm always fascinated about the sheit that happens when it happens, as it always does.

Through understanding that your not in control of anything, when sheit happens, it's okay. Simply because you understand, on a deep reptilian brain level (yep, that's how deep the 'understanding' has to go to be truly "done" with the sheit that happens), that in the grand scheme of things the sheit that happened was supposed to happen exactly as it happened or it simply would not have happened as it happened when it happened.

The question you need to ask your "self" is, when sheit happens, "why do I think sheit should have happened differently than the sheit that happened exactly as it did? Why do I think the sheit happening that is my life should be some other sheit happening? Why do I spend my days gritting and grinding over the sheit that is my life, when it had to happen exactly as it did and has to be exactly what it is or it would be different than what it is."

Let us recite the "sheit happens" prayer:

God grant me the serenity to accept that sheit happens.
(good and bad. It's all just sheit happening)
The courage to know that I can't stop sheit from happening.
And the wisdom to just let sheit happen as it happens, when it happens,
cause it always happens exactly as it does and couldn't happen any other way
and my response to sheit happening will happen exactly as that sheit should happen, each and every time.

AhfookingMen.....



Artwork by Igor Morski