Nobody's Perfect...(except me)

You are “you” in relation to “others.” Egocentric isolation is delusional, since it assumes a self-construct developed entirely absent the influence of others. One need not engage in spiritual practices to realize this. In fact, spiritual or religious practices, that reinforce self-absorption under ideological dogma, may inadvertently interrupt this reciprocal circuitry by disengaging you from others.

Your love partner infuriates you by his behaviors, as you infuriate him by yours. Yet, rarely do you realize that his behaviors have emerged in reaction to you, as your behaviors evolved in response to him.

This reciprocal circuitry becomes antagonistic and combative simply because both parties in the mutual exchange fail to acknowledge the circular nature of conflict and instead form direct lines of attack, never losing sight of the target (each other).

There is no flow of direct current in this reciprocal exchange. It is always alternating from one to another and back again. Yet the ego-self must seek to make the current of mutual conflict direct through blame and condemnation in the need to assert your innocence and increase their guilt.

Unfortunately, the ego (“you”) rarely recognizes this circuitous exchange, because it would mean focusing on itself and experiencing guilt for what "you" do, as opposed to merely an all out condemnation of the other. Although not very good at recognizing its own erratic and dysfunctional behaviors, the ego is skilled to perfection in identifying and condemning the behaviors of others (judgment), particularly those whom the ego has come to be familiar with through “love" (ironically).

This is why the world exhibits continued blame and condemnation, but little in the way of actual change (patterns of hate and mistrust are continually repeated). Nations remain chronically antagonistic, while relying on fragile peace accords and cease fires to offset outright war and destruction. So why would we expect this to be absent from our egocentric personal world, while it is clearly apparent in the collective world?

The collective world is the product of many personal worlds in conflict (yours included).

Yet, just as the world refuses to see the reciprocal/mutual circuitry of its patterned conflicts, we also refuse to acknowledge this reciprocal exchange in our personal relationships.

We frequently exclaim that “nobody’s perfect” with regard to our own erroneous decisions. Yet, we’re less likely to support such a disclaimer from others, especially those we have come to identify as recipients of our “love” and who we evaluate as betraying our love by failing to meet our egocentric standards.

Because of this, love has become our damnation instead of the means to our "awakening," since it is often our most significant 'loved' ones who receive our most fervent blame and condemnation. Unfortunately, this reciprocal exchange of blame and condemnation is self-reinforcing and, if not identified early, can only progress in intensity, eventually causing the most intimate of relationships to self-destruct and separate.

Become aware of the reciprocal circuitry, which has no direct current but alternates continuously from one to another, and recognize that this circuit would NOT exist...

...without YOU.

Artwork by Val Jean - "Companionship; Loneliness"